I made a tumblr for my makeup! Since tags are kind of hit-and-miss on here with whether or not they actually find all of the posts for them, I’m going to start putting such posts there, rather than on my main and just tagging it with “Idg does Cosplay”.
SO! If you like my work, go on and follow that. I just made it, so haven’t uploaded anything to it just yet. I’m also about to have to leave, so it’ll be tonight that I get to posting things.
I’ve told that child repeatedly not to just grab the remote and change it without permission, and yet she insists on doing it, anyway.
Then again, she often acts as if she is a higher authority than me, back-talking and contradicting when I tell her not to do something, or when I’m trying to be stern with the spoiled two-year-old.
It’s more so a matter of her not listening to stuff I’ve told her in the past, and constantly disregarding what I say, than merely that I’ve missed the thing I was watching. I know if I say anything to Steph about it, she’ll get mad and tell me to just relax and stop throwing fits, especially since that niece likes to do chores and stuff and is doted on as being the perfect one, always used as the one that the boys are compared against when they misbehave or just act like boys their ages tend to do.
I dunno, just thinking all of that adds to some level of a superiority complex in her, and adds to her elder brother’s already present frustrations with other things, since he’s the one that is so often in trouble for stuff.
Then again, kids often see me as someone they don’t have to listen to, so maybe I’m just asking too much.
Then I have other, completely separate things that are bugging me. That stuff’s only encouraging my desire for what I’m talking about in that last post, though.
Of the romantical sort.
It’s been getting stronger and stronger, which has had me bewildered since I couldn’t see what could be causing it.
Then it hit me earlier that it was a year ago this weekend that I asked out a guy that I’m thankfully still friends with. He was the first guy I’d been interested in in that way, more than in mere passing, my first venture to ask anyone out since high school. Because of bad experiences growing up, I don’t fall easily, and I haven’t since this.
I’ve seen since then the sorts of girls he goes for. Tall, great figures, drop dead gorgeous. Not short, stumpy, geeky on wheels.
Hell, it’s not even that I’m still holding out for him, specifically. No, I accepted when he first said he wanted to be friends that that was it, and like I said I’m grateful to have at least that. I just.
There was a post earlier about how it’s confidence that draws the guys, not the ass and tits. Which, yeah, I know that not all are just after the sex, that it’s a matter of chemistry and who you click with. I so often get told how much people like how confident I am (though that could just because I’m disabled and don’t show a mopey attitude), and I always try to be as happy and self-assured as I can be, because I don’t like focusing on the negatives, because life’s too short.
I don’t even know what I’m getting at. I’m just tired of feeling awkward and lonely and having to be strong. I want someone to be there to hold me when I need it. I want someone to look at me like I see my friends who are in relationships looking at each other. I want to be worth it.
Memo to self: Have “my own family using the term ‘lame’ as an insult, when it is a term I strive to reclaim,” be one of the things I talk about in my videos for the Disability Awareness Panel.
It’s weird, because usually that term doesn’t bug me in and of itself. But, considering that Mom used it earlier to describe how I said I want to read the copy of The Hobbit that I bought for my sister before I give it to her, since I’ve not really had the chance to read the book since middle school, yeah it rubbed me the wrong way. She also called me a regifter for it? And then said for me to relax and that it was just a joke when I got annoyed.
There is one, however, that makes my heart flutter and I become a nervous fangirl at the thought of speaking to them.
Said she gets to get the pick of the litter, and so I asked if I can get one.
She replied that we’ll have to share, that I don’t get to have one all to myself.
Because, you know, I’ll totally be living here forever.
It’s shit like that, cheeky little comments, that makes it really frustrating how long it’s taking to be able to get out of here.
It was fun to see Jenn and her kids again, since they moved away a few months ago. Had fun with the kids all-in-all, though other than that damn this weekend was full of bullshit. I’m pretty tired and don’t feel like risking being all tl;dr, so the most you guys will get is a bulleted list of the bullshit!
But, like I said, I had a blast with the kids, and talked my sister into letting my eldest nephew stay here tonight, so we watched The Walking Dead together. Gotta get him back home early tomorrow afternoon, but still.
Ben Nye make-up
- Boots - On their way
Rusted steel pipe
- Pantyhose - May or may not do this
Added the steel pipe now that I know which weapon I want to use. Also took out the months because I may move them around with when I get each item. Still gonna try to not make it more than two or three a month.
Gonna end up making the pipe and vest, so there we go.
Added the pantyhose, which before I’d counted under make-up supplies. Separating them now just so I don’t forget.
Ugh, my boots need to ship out already. But, hey, I got the turtleneck now!
Gotta get back to scheduling when I do things. I will bloody up what I have with the blood I have, edit the jacket I’ve ordered into a vest, and rust up my pipe. Tomorrow I’m going to call the local place that’s supposed to be getting Ben Nye stuff in, and ask them about fake blood, liquid latex, and sealer, and from what they say I will know where to go for that stuff. It will be after the first that I get that stuff, though. Then make prosthetics to make Halloween go quicker.
I may start posting pics as I get things done, if anyone is interested in seeing them.
Jacket’s here, gotta take the sleeves off! It’s a bit baggy, but with my luck if I’d ordered a smaller size it would have been too small. I have a short torso, though, so the problem really is moreso in the height of it than the width. Mom’s going to swing by the costume shop in Savannah next time she goes that way and get me a big thing of liquid latex and fake blood so that I don’t have to pay for shipping. Boots I’m still waiting on, but if they’re not here by the 7th, I’m going to look into getting them from somewhere else, I guess. Really wish the tracker would work already. =/ Gonna order Instant Rust probably the night of the 30th.
WE’RE IN THE HOME STRETCH. Just gotta make the prosthetic for my left arm next week and possibly do my legs then, as well. Still waiting on my boots, but if they’re not here by the 26th then I’ll swing by Wal-Mart and get a pair there that look close (though the ones I ordered are PERFECT SOB). Gonna make my face prosthetic and bloody my clothes the week after next. Hoping to get people together to go see Revelations after Scare on the Square, where a bunch of us will be in zombie make-up, and I’ll be in this costume. We’ll see if I can get a group together, haha!
We’ll see how long I manage to not be lazy and swap over to this tumblr when people piss me off, now won’t we?